For our latest collaboration, Britain Uncovered took a road trip up to the North-West to meet with Manchester-based artist, @lifemodel.rach! Following an in-depth conversation about all things life modelling in Rachel’s city centre studio, we then ventured out into the West Yorkshire countryside where we spent the afternoon capturing some original images that serve as the perfect accompaniment to our lively discussion. Here, in words and pictures, is part one of how our day unfolded.
Britain Uncovered: Hi Rachel! We’ve very much enjoyed following your journey as a life model over the past few years, and it’s always interesting seeing the different events you’re involved with! But going back to the beginning, how did you first get started as a model, and what were you initial motivations in these early stages? Had you been to life drawing classes as an artist, or were you simply curious about the process?
Rachel: I had never been to a life drawing class, and I didn’t think they even happened anymore! If I remember rightly, it all came from a conversation with an artist who is a friend of my Mum's. She used to life model for Southport College, so when she heard I was moving to Manchester, she said to me that the college wasn’t that far away – so I got in touch with them to see if they needed a model. And they did!
But also, I’ve been dancing ever since I can remember – probably from as I soon as I could walk – and it was a huge part of my life. I ended up going to an American Association of Dance (AAD) school where we trained for the national championships that took place every year at the Winter Gardens in Blackpool. I absolutely loved it, and I think I missed being on stage.
By the time I went to university I had stopped dancing competitively, and I realised that I missed using my body for something expressive and artistic, so the life modelling must have come up in conversation as a result of that. I always thought it would be a cool thing to do, but it wasn't really something that I thought very much or very long about. I just mentioned it in passing to somebody, and they said they could probably get me a job doing that, which was great. It’s not replaced dancing, but it’s given me a similar creative outlet.
BU: Whilst growing up, how comfortable did you feel in terms of body image, and did you feel particularly body confident in these early days? Did being up on stage as a dancer influence the way you felt about yourself or bring on additional pressures?
Rachel: It was quite a mixed bag really. Because of the dancing I was looking at myself in the mirror quite a lot, and was being told, “That needs to be straighter”, or that I needed to do this, that and the other. So you learn to look at yourself with quite a critical eye.
I was always very slim and was always very aware of being underweight. Growing up I’d see my friends looking like young women, and me looking like a young boy in terms of being quite straight up and down.
But I also had a tough time. I had my ears pinned back on the NHS when I was in my early teens. They were very sticky out and very misshapen, and I was getting quite badly bullied. I was even getting prank calls and death threats, so at the age of 13/14 I decided to have the surgery, and went through the process of being interviewed by the surgeons to make sure that I was doing it for the right reasons.
Then, in my second year at university, I had a nose job because I had quite a big nose. I had quite a big nose that really didn’t fit my small face, and I would always cover my face in photographs. It was especially difficult when it came to dancing, and when I was supposed to be looking confident and smiling and projecting those kinds of things. It was just another layer of that. So I paid for the nose job myself when I was twenty-something.
Having my ears put back was probably one of the best things I ever did. It really did allow me to navigate my late teens and early twenties without that horrible thing happening. And five years later, the kids who bullied me became pals, and I realised that it's just horrible things that kids say – but you do carry it with you. But as I've got older, I don't really think about that so much.
But I would say that life modelling has been a huge part of being okay with the way that I look today. I still struggle with my face, and I would hate for someone to be like, “Oh, let’s take some pictures of your face”, but in terms of my body and being able to put my body in a certain way, it’s doing a job that looks interesting. I’m quite happy with that.
BU: It’s incredibly disheartening to hear that you had received such comments, and we’re so sorry to hear you endured this. But to be able to go from that point, to then in later life being confident enough to go out in front of a class full of people and take off your robe and say, unapologetically, “This is me, and this is who I am”, shows that you’ve been on quite the journey – so congratulations on having overcome this early adversity. I guess this shows just how far you’ve come during that time?
Rachel: Yes, definitely. And there are some times where I still surprise myself when I'm doing that work.
BU: In what way?
Rachel: Just in terms of going around the class and chatting to everybody when I’ve just put my robe on; or there are times when I’m shooting with somebody and we're just having a chat and I forget that I'm nude and they've got clothes on.
BU: Considering the hang-ups you described along with the challenges you went through, how comfortable did you feel about the nudity element of the life modelling? For a lot of people who have maybe never done anything like that before, it would likely be quite a big step. How did you approach that side of things, and was that something you were apprehensive about? Or were you quite casual about the process?
Rachel: I was pretty casual about it, because from dancing you have to be okay with getting changed in front of people. There are quick costume changes backstage, for example, and sometimes you just stand there and people dress and undress you. There might be six people there and they're undressing you, and you're having your hair and makeup done at the same time. You've maybe got 35-40 seconds to get changed and to have a whole different face, makeup and hairdo. You're getting changed in front of people all the time, so I think I just got quite used to being nude or semi-nude and became quite desensitised to it.
So I was very casual about it. When I arrived at my first life modelling class, I had a chat with the tutor and then went into to my little changing room, put my robe on, came out and was absolutely fine – until she said, “And begin”. I dropped my robe and there was such an adrenaline rush. I'm not really a sweaty person, but for the first five minutes I was thinking, “Oh my god, what have you done?” But because it was a series of five one-minute poses, very quickly I said to myself, “Stop panicking, you've got to think about what you're going to do next.”
BU: Were you more focused on the work element to the point where it distracted you from being in the spotlight?
Rachel: Exactly. It was just like, “Oop! How have I ended up doing that? How have I ended up here?” But very quickly, like you say, you’re focused on the fact you have a job to do, and then what kicks in is the feeling of, “I want to do the best job, so what pose am I going to do next”. That’s usually the thing that snaps me out of any sort of uncomfortable feeling.
But yes, I was very, very chilled about being nude right up until the moment that it had to happen. But the feeling went away almost as quickly.
BU: Having been life modelling for nearly two years now, how would you say you’ve evolved as a model over this time? Has your approach changed somewhat, or do you still have the same fundamentals you had to start with?
Rachel: I think I still have the same fundamentals. I'm more about providing short, dynamic poses where I’m being as complicated-looking as possible than I am about long poses. With the longer poses, I get bored and they're really uncomfortable. But I think I've just pushed it a little bit further, and I will try to keep making myself as complicated to draw as I can!
In terms of evolving, I’d say I feel I more confident, much like you are with anything you do for a little while. But I would like to become a bit more expressive in terms of props, maybe. I don't really tend to use props. Life models sometimes will rock up when I'm hosting a session with a bag of tricks – such as a yoga mat, and blocks and stools – and I tend to turn up with nothing.
BU: What kind of feedback have you received from the artists you’ve posed for?
Rachel: I’m very lucky, as I get really lovely feedback. Sometimes people have said, “That was really hard”, which is probably because I've pointed a leg at them and there's lots of foreshortening, or I've become particularly twisted.
The curly hair is a big thing for people, so I will always have my hair tied up unless it's requested down because it just scares people! Or people spend all their time trying to draw the curly hair and then they forget to do everything else.
BU: Which have been some of your favourite classes to have modelled for? Are there any that stand out as being particularly memorable in any way?
Rachel: It's hard to pick one really. I'm lucky that I've never had a bad life drawing experience. I would say two that spring to mind are the duets that I've done with Adam, because they were really exciting to do. He’s an extremely experienced and respected model, so it was daunting as I was worried about letting him down, or not doing my best. But we were both really happy with how they went, and it’s great fun working together, doing improvised sessions with our similar styles. So that was amazing, and the artwork was incredible too.
And then recently I went out to Globe Arts in Slaithwaite and did a day for an artist called Jo Blaker, who was leading a class of six artists – and it was unlike any other life drawing class I’d ever witnessed.
When I arrived, she had dug up all the weeds from her garden and had them on the table in a big pile of compost. And they were drawing all over the table. And she let me join in. The concept was basically about plants and how they grow through cracks and crevices and things like that. She said that she was going to try and bring that into the posing.
It was four hours, during which time she projected things onto me and we had all these different exercises. She turned the lights on and off as they were drawing, and it was just a really cool concept. It wasn't a traditional live drawing class by any means, and the artwork was not particularly traditional either, but it was still amazing. It was just a very inspiring experience. So even though I was really, really tired, I left with my brain buzzing and thinking, “Wow, I would never have thought that as something to do at a live drawing class.”
I would say those are the two that stand out.
BU: What are some of the biggest misconceptions about life-drawing classes, and how do people react when you find out you model for these types of classes? Is it frustrating to deal with potentially negative reactions, and does it show an immaturity in society that many will still raise an eyebrow or perceive it as sexual or titillating in some way?
Rachel: Yes, and I think especially so in the UK – it's definitely more noticeable here. But yes, some people are just like, “Oh, it must be nice just to get to sit down and take your kit off and get paid”. I think people think models get paid loads of money as well, when we don't. But yes, I think people think it's easy, which it definitely isn't. And there's that thing where people will think, “You're easy”, or whatever. Someone said to me the other day, “I didn't know you were a stripper”. That's not what I do!
There’s a lack of understanding of what actually happens in that room, I think. But again, I was chatting with someone recently about the fact that life drawing doesn't happen in schools anymore. It doesn’t even happen in universities for fine art students – it’s not on the curriculum. So I think that unless you are interested in it – and I'm struggling to think of anywhere where I've even seen a life drawing class represented in TV or film – but other than that, unless you've been to one, you're not going to know what it's about.
I definitely think people are still like way behind on their attitudes towards nudity and yes, the body positivity movement is doing amazing work. It's an ongoing battle, and there's still so much work to do to change existing attitudes, as well as addressing how people's perceptions are shaped from a young age.
BU: For those who’ve never given it a go, do you think people would find life modelling a valuable experience in terms of helping them accept their bodies and feel more comfortable in their own skin - or is it not for everyone? Would you perhaps have to be in a certain mindset to get the most out of it?
Rachel: I think if you were in the right mindset and gave it a go, it would definitely be a positive experience. I have had plenty of people approach me who have said, “I'd love to model, but I don't want to do it where I usually draw.” So one of the things that I would like to do in my studio is to facilitate that by setting up a very small group and inviting people to model who have never modelled before. And it would be a safe space where they don't know anybody.
But having that experience and seeing the work that people make of you, and listening to their comments, is so valuable – and people are so grateful that you're there. When I started modelling, an artist that I was speaking to said to me, “This act that you do, so many artists couldn't make their work without you there”. And it’s true. You're the most important person in the room at a life drawing class, and people are so grateful that you're there – and the way people are looking at you is very different to how everybody looks at themselves every day. I think it's a really beautiful thing, and a great experience, but you definitely need to be in the right frame of mind.
BU: What are some of the challenges you experience now when it comes to modelling? Are there times when you’re not necessarily in the mood, or your body confidence isn’t where you’d like it to be, for instance? Are these the types of difficulties you have to navigate from time to time?
Rachel: I definitely have my ups and downs, especially in terms of energy levels, because I'll be thinking, “I really want to do my best, but I'm really tired”. I'm usually out of the house for 10, 15, sometimes 18 hours of the day. I might have been up at 4am, worked, then done a shift, and then gone to a life drawing class. So tiredness and energy levels are big factors, because people pick up on that, and you don't want to seem unprofessional.
Obviously for those of us who have the time of the month, that's a huge factor too. But yes, your mental state and your emotional state are big factors. I have my days where I'm really excited to go and be somewhere, but then I have my days where I just want to be under a duvet. But I do tend to find I know that once I'm there and once I'm doing it, it's the best thing for me.
Because I'm so busy, to actually have two hours where my job is to be still has actually been so valuable for me in terms of just having some space to not have to be speaking to anyone. I don't have to speak to anyone, nobody's talking to me, and I can just organise my thoughts. Or, I am so peaceful that I'm just totally away with the fairies. I don't meditate, but I imagine it's like I end up in the same headspace, especially during longer poses. I can be kind of elsewhere.
So, yes, it's very valuable.
– In part two of our conversation, we’ll be focusing on how Rachel has subsequently modelled nude for a variety of photoshoots – ours included – and we're discussing in detail the challenges of seeing ourselves in this different type of light. We’ll also be touching on the body positivity movement, Rachel's aspirations for the future, her advice for would-be models, and more on her work as a life model!
For more from Rachel, feel free to follow her Instagram, @lifemodel.rach, where you’ll see first-hand not only how prolific the model is, but how incredibly diverse Rachel’s projects are likewise. If you fancy trying your hand at drawing or painting Rachel, you can also purchase reference sets to work from directly from Rachel’s Gumroad page.
Comments